November 13, 2022
Dear Great Grandson,
Yesterday I published a post addressed to you, my Great Grandson. I’m not a little surprised that anybody actually read the post, but it caused some confusion amongst the Thurmosphere faithful and I’d like to take this opportunity to clarify a few things;
- First. Today, I am a sixty-year-old man, with two children (that I’m aware of) I can with a high degree of certainty call my own. Neither of them have had children of their own (that I’m aware of). Thus, you are (currently) a fictional character and my familial title is just “pa”, “dad”, or ‘father’.
- Second, I anticipate my children will one day have children of their own. That would make me a “GRANDpa”. I’m no mathematician but I do know my way around a calculator, and it tells me that the soonest I could become a Grandpa is Summer 2023. Moreover, these communiques aren’t for my grandchildren. I’ll likely be able to crack-wise directly at them. These messages are for YOU! My Great Grandchild. I’m already dead! Sorry, not sorry.
- I’m not killing myself or dying (that I’m aware of). I’m in the best shape (physically and mentally) since I turned sixty (do the math). I feel great. I just wish this writing gig generated enough income to get your Great Grandma off my
asscase. (Note: She’ll never see this. She is not one of the faithful).
I estimate that the soonest you, a genuine, direct descendant, no-bullshit Great Grandchild of mine will have the ability and desire to read this is probably around the year 2060. I’m not so sure the human race is going to make it.
Until next time, kiss your computer (e.g. personal AI-enabled robot) for me…Great Grandpa